Prior to an awesome visit from my Mom for a triple-threat celebration of her birthday, Thanksgiving, and an early Christmas, I had gotten on a great ride with my writing. While she was here, I managed to work out a piece one morning. Other than that, I've been focused on relaxing, connecting, and entertaining.
Meanwhile, the amount of energy...physical, palpable energy, coursing through my nervous system has increased and intensified day-by-day, to the point of discomfort. And all as the Moon is waxing towards Full.
I've felt these sensations before, usually after leading a workshop closer to evening. Now it's becoming more consistent. That is, when I haven't written.
Dots are connecting quicker than ever lately, as I allow needed information to surface rather than being on some sort of blood-hungry hunt for it through my intellect. Mostly.
This energy feels like a burning and twitching in my nerves. Mostly in my arms and legs and the center of my chest.
It's the energy of Creation. It is here to support me, and work through me. However, far too many hours have passed without using it to Create. Thus the discomfort. Not like some sort of punishment...far too old-school of a fundamentalist point of view. Just energy on the move. I have to express it in productive ways.
This morning, the first thing to come out was a poem. And clearly that wasn't enough expression. The energy is still pulsing and throbbing in my nerves. As I was walking through my kitchen, intuition simply said, "Write more. Now."
It really doesn't matter what I write about either. So far, it only seems to matter that it be more of a stream of writing that flows, rather than moving it through a whole routine of thinking and figuring out. When I try to move it through my intellect, irritation, like a scratchy 1920's wool Army blanket next to the softest part of your neck. Ick...
It's gotta flow. The more I engage with the flow, the more energy I have, the more my mood lifts and expands...the more my Heart opens...the more I enjoy EVERYTHING as it is.
It's a process of discovery for me, this Creativity scavenger hunt. Everyday I write, another clue; another dot connected. I'm grateful for all the awareness being brought to me in these ways. It reminds me of my relationship to my roof-garden. Each day I go up with water and Love to the plants, and now a whole proliferation of new sprouts throughout the garden, each day attending to this journey, I see more growth. The plants are a little larger, a little greener.
Who knows where it all goes. It doesn't really matter, as it's all good!
Saturday, November 28, 2009
Excavation...
Something is happening.
In the chambers of my Heart
whilst quietly aslumber
amongst the
coziest of the cozy places
wedged effortlessly
between the various lumps of
feathers and cloth.
Ajar...
Clearly someone
must've
loosed the latch
leaving a window
to the chambers ajar.
And now this
Living Wind is
racing through the rooms
looking for any and all
ancient dust
which simply
doesn't belong,
whipping it up and out
of these causeways through
and around
and now
inside
the sanctum sanctorum.
Rupturing with a giggle
that glides
into to an uproaring
escape of
richter scale 9.2 laughter.
The gossamer veil
that once surrounded the
whole enterprise
in double-bagged
fashion
like groceries
in the 80's
is now flapping and flying in
this unstoppable
breeze
that is sometimes
racing at gale force.
I am Alive.
Scott Patrick Schwenk 11/28/09
In the chambers of my Heart
whilst quietly aslumber
amongst the
coziest of the cozy places
wedged effortlessly
between the various lumps of
feathers and cloth.
Ajar...
Clearly someone
must've
loosed the latch
leaving a window
to the chambers ajar.
And now this
Living Wind is
racing through the rooms
looking for any and all
ancient dust
which simply
doesn't belong,
whipping it up and out
of these causeways through
and around
and now
inside
the sanctum sanctorum.
Rupturing with a giggle
that glides
into to an uproaring
escape of
richter scale 9.2 laughter.
The gossamer veil
that once surrounded the
whole enterprise
in double-bagged
fashion
like groceries
in the 80's
is now flapping and flying in
this unstoppable
breeze
that is sometimes
racing at gale force.
I am Alive.
Scott Patrick Schwenk 11/28/09
Friday, November 27, 2009
Full-Moon Practice, Wed Dec 2nd
Full-Moon Practice...on Wednesday, December 2, 2009
This Wednesday night, we’ll gather to work Consciously with the profound energy of the Full-Moon. Questions to consider as you prepare to dive in ~ What are you ready to complete, let go of, and shed from the past year/years? What are you ready to step into, Create, and live in 2010 and beyond?
We’re calling this event THE PRACTICE, and it’s for ALL levels of experience with the Breath. It happens for now in the sanctity of my healing space in West Hollywood. Reserve your space as soon as you know you’ll be coming, as it fills up quickly...
In this workshop, there won’t be much talking. We’ll set some intention very quickly in the beginning, and then get right down to the business of the Breathwork; an ancient 3-part breathing meditation that takes you beyond the dream of the limited ego experience....into the space of GRACE, the space of KNOWING, the space of deep REJUVENATION.
This is designed to be a place to work deeply with the breath and build /strengthen the muscles for your home practice.
ARRIVE on-time or better yet, early. No one will be admitted after the breathwork begins to honor and support the safe space created for The Work.
When: Wednesday, December 2, 2009
Time: 7:30 – 9:00pm
Exchange: $40
Where: 1226 Havenhurst Dr. #9
(Havenhurst is 1 block West of Crescent Heights between Santa Monica Blvd and Fountain Ave)
Parking: It’s best to park at a meter on Santa Monica Blvd or in the West Hollywood City Lot just South of Santa Monica Blvd behind Out Of The Closet between Havenhurst and La Jolla. The City Lot is $1 per hour in quarters. Other meters in the area are free after 6pm.
RSVP: Due to size of the space, please RSVP to hold your place. If need be, we’ll start a waiting list. 24hrs cancellation by phone. (310) 922-4890
BRING: A folded blanket and/or yoga mat to lay on for the breathing meditation, water, and a smile!
LOVE,
SCOTT
http://trustthebreath.com
http://scottschwenk.blogspot.com
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
Breath of the Heart
It's the Holidays...
Knowingly, and unknowingly...all sorts of emotions, thoughts, and feelings are getting stimulated for many of us. How will I/we meet them? Do I need to go into my intellect to "figure it all out"? Am I willing to Trust the work I've done and continue to do to anchor my awareness in the Heart? Do I need to be reminded to slow down by traffic tickets, arguments, or aches and pains? Can I still choose the foods that support my body to function in a state of grounded expansion?
As I was on the elliptical trainer at the gym this morning I was chewing on these questions.
On Sunday morning, I did receive a traffic ticket, just two blocks from my house. I was coming from the gym, and headed to LAX to pick up my Mom to join me for the Thanksgiving Week. As I was coming through the intersection, I was feeling antsy and sped up to go around the car in front of me who was waiting longer than I would've liked to make a left turn. As I crossed the intersection, I realized quickly that I needed to slow the car down, and as I was braking, I saw a cop on my right, knowing instantly that he saw me and would be giving me a ticket. I was ticketed for going 38 in a 25mph zone.
And while it was a relatively mild run over the speed limit, and I was decelerating to go even slower, the Universe was putting me on notice that once again my awareness needs to be more refined and vigilant to embody the Awareness that I'm engaging with now. What passed muster a few months ago no longer carries the day today. There's no resting on the "laurels" of my previous efforts.
There was a big spiking piece of my ego that wanted to be "right" about my actions at the intersection, even more of a red-flag that something was off and needed more attention from me.
It's important for me to know the places where I can still feel entitled; entitled to speed up through the intersection because it's my neighborhood, entitled to some form of "special" treatment for any reason. At this stage in the game, special is a way of remaining separate, and separate is a recipe for suffering. I am a healer and a conduit for healing Presence in every area of my life. As I slow down, choose Peace, and Trust, I am divinely guided into Flow in every area of my life. This way of walking through my world is more healing to those around me than anything I can say...it is the greatest way of teaching...by living it ever more fully.
The Heart is the hub of all sacred places, go there and roam. ~Bhagavan Nityananda
This week, I am making more time to take breaths into the very center of this Temple, my Heart. As I breath into this sacred space, my vision opens to see the sacredness of every space, every being, every intersection, and I treat them all with the honor and reverence and joy I bring to the Temple of my own Heart.
Knowingly, and unknowingly...all sorts of emotions, thoughts, and feelings are getting stimulated for many of us. How will I/we meet them? Do I need to go into my intellect to "figure it all out"? Am I willing to Trust the work I've done and continue to do to anchor my awareness in the Heart? Do I need to be reminded to slow down by traffic tickets, arguments, or aches and pains? Can I still choose the foods that support my body to function in a state of grounded expansion?
As I was on the elliptical trainer at the gym this morning I was chewing on these questions.
On Sunday morning, I did receive a traffic ticket, just two blocks from my house. I was coming from the gym, and headed to LAX to pick up my Mom to join me for the Thanksgiving Week. As I was coming through the intersection, I was feeling antsy and sped up to go around the car in front of me who was waiting longer than I would've liked to make a left turn. As I crossed the intersection, I realized quickly that I needed to slow the car down, and as I was braking, I saw a cop on my right, knowing instantly that he saw me and would be giving me a ticket. I was ticketed for going 38 in a 25mph zone.
And while it was a relatively mild run over the speed limit, and I was decelerating to go even slower, the Universe was putting me on notice that once again my awareness needs to be more refined and vigilant to embody the Awareness that I'm engaging with now. What passed muster a few months ago no longer carries the day today. There's no resting on the "laurels" of my previous efforts.
There was a big spiking piece of my ego that wanted to be "right" about my actions at the intersection, even more of a red-flag that something was off and needed more attention from me.
It's important for me to know the places where I can still feel entitled; entitled to speed up through the intersection because it's my neighborhood, entitled to some form of "special" treatment for any reason. At this stage in the game, special is a way of remaining separate, and separate is a recipe for suffering. I am a healer and a conduit for healing Presence in every area of my life. As I slow down, choose Peace, and Trust, I am divinely guided into Flow in every area of my life. This way of walking through my world is more healing to those around me than anything I can say...it is the greatest way of teaching...by living it ever more fully.
The Heart is the hub of all sacred places, go there and roam. ~Bhagavan Nityananda
This week, I am making more time to take breaths into the very center of this Temple, my Heart. As I breath into this sacred space, my vision opens to see the sacredness of every space, every being, every intersection, and I treat them all with the honor and reverence and joy I bring to the Temple of my own Heart.
Sunday, November 22, 2009
Absolute Monarchy
"You must have Absolute Monarchy over your inner world," someone said to me recently.
When the King doesn't know he's the King, doesn't sit powerfully in the seat, the role, of the King, he won't be King for long. You and I are have been wandering through this life, mostly deluded into believing something is missing, wrong, not quite ready, almost there...about ourselves! And the Truth of the matter is we are Whole, Perfect, Complete...what in Sanskrit is referred to as Purna.
There is a beautiful prayer/mantra in the Upanishads that is said to encapusulate the whole of the Upanishads. (The Upanishads have exerted an important influence on the rest of Hindu philosophy and were collectively considered one of the 100 Most Influential Books Ever Written by the British poet Martin Seymour-Smith (Wikipedia, 11/09).) In this prayer it is said,
Om. That is Perfect. This is Perfect. From the
Perfect springs the Perfect. If the perfect is
taken from the Perfect, the Perfect remains.
Like that little boy in "The Matrix" in the scene just before Neo goes in to meet with the Oracle hoping to find out he is. This monk-ish little boy, wrapped in white, playing at bending spoons with just the power of his Awareness, tells Neo, "It is not the spoon that bends, it is your mind that bends" (giving the 'appearance' that the spoon has bent).
The ancient philosophy of Vedanta encourages us to see Truly. And that to cultivate the ability to see Reality as It is, we need the support of discrimination; the ability to know the difference between fantasy and Reality, between projection/illusion and things as they really are. If you're walking down a dirt road in the middle of the night in Costa Rica, and up ahead you see something long, thick, and curvy laying across the middle of the road, it may be a snake...or a rope. Whichever you believe it is in the moment will determine whether your heart nearly thumps out of your ribcage believing it to be a dangerous snake, or you go on enjoying a peaceful walk as you step over the rope.
How many situations have I walked through in my life, attempting to rearrange the situation rather than my own point of view? The Buddhists call this act rearranging the furniture in a burning house. And another teacher laughs when he calls this way of walking through life, rearranging the deck-chairs on the Titanic.
Swami Muktananda of Ganeshpuri would say often, "The world is as you see it. If you don't like the world you see, change the prescription of your glasses."
We live in a time when so many of the greatest and most potent of teachings once passed from teacher to student in secret after many years of preparation are now out strewn out in books and youtube videos for anyone to find. How will we recognize these Diamond-sharp tools? Will we, and do we, mistake them for blunt, useless instruments?
I can have the best vegetable seeds on the market, harvested from plants grown with great attention and love in idyllic conditions on the most Organic farm known to man (I'm salivating...ha ha ha!). I can plant those seeds in my roof garden today. But if the soil hasn't been nurtured, and if I don't water and care for those seeds consistently over time, it won't matter how amazing the promise of great plants might be, nothing is going to grow in those conditions.
I came across some of the most potent teachings of my life over twenty years ago, but didn't recognize them. I was too busy hunting for anything that would give me a big peak experience. In my book it was all about gathering enough of these peak experiences, out-of-body moments, and overwhelming energy encounters, and amassing a lot of them. Then if I could string them all together, I could live in one big extended peak experience for life. So tell me, how is that any different that any other kind of addict? Seeking a peak experience from a bottle, a pill, a whatever? The only difference being that my addiction was legal and encouraged widely in the spiritual marketplace.
After years of this cat and mouse game with myself, I'm now (mostly) at the place where I know that biggest focus of my path is inside of me, if not the only useful focus. What am I believing? Can I know it's the Truth for certain? What happens when I believe "x"? What's here when I let go of all beliefs and sit quietly in gratitude and appreciation of this Moment exactly as it is, without a story or narration going in the background...just this moment, this inhalation, exactly as it is...not a good inhalation, not a bad inhalation, just the breath circulating.
And in this moment of just simple awareness of my own breath, I am present. When I am present, this Presence burns off the image of dark threatening clouds, revealing the Sun always steadily shining within.
Do I really need one more book? One more lecture? One more technique? Or do I have everything I need right Here? Am I willing to cultivate this garden over time, protecting the little Oak Tree shoots until they're strong and tall with deep roots, and broad leaves that give shade to anyone who's ready to rest in the Oasis of Reality?
I Am.
When the King doesn't know he's the King, doesn't sit powerfully in the seat, the role, of the King, he won't be King for long. You and I are have been wandering through this life, mostly deluded into believing something is missing, wrong, not quite ready, almost there...about ourselves! And the Truth of the matter is we are Whole, Perfect, Complete...what in Sanskrit is referred to as Purna.
There is a beautiful prayer/mantra in the Upanishads that is said to encapusulate the whole of the Upanishads. (The Upanishads have exerted an important influence on the rest of Hindu philosophy and were collectively considered one of the 100 Most Influential Books Ever Written by the British poet Martin Seymour-Smith (Wikipedia, 11/09).) In this prayer it is said,
Om. That is Perfect. This is Perfect. From the
Perfect springs the Perfect. If the perfect is
taken from the Perfect, the Perfect remains.
Like that little boy in "The Matrix" in the scene just before Neo goes in to meet with the Oracle hoping to find out he is. This monk-ish little boy, wrapped in white, playing at bending spoons with just the power of his Awareness, tells Neo, "It is not the spoon that bends, it is your mind that bends" (giving the 'appearance' that the spoon has bent).
The ancient philosophy of Vedanta encourages us to see Truly. And that to cultivate the ability to see Reality as It is, we need the support of discrimination; the ability to know the difference between fantasy and Reality, between projection/illusion and things as they really are. If you're walking down a dirt road in the middle of the night in Costa Rica, and up ahead you see something long, thick, and curvy laying across the middle of the road, it may be a snake...or a rope. Whichever you believe it is in the moment will determine whether your heart nearly thumps out of your ribcage believing it to be a dangerous snake, or you go on enjoying a peaceful walk as you step over the rope.
How many situations have I walked through in my life, attempting to rearrange the situation rather than my own point of view? The Buddhists call this act rearranging the furniture in a burning house. And another teacher laughs when he calls this way of walking through life, rearranging the deck-chairs on the Titanic.
Swami Muktananda of Ganeshpuri would say often, "The world is as you see it. If you don't like the world you see, change the prescription of your glasses."
We live in a time when so many of the greatest and most potent of teachings once passed from teacher to student in secret after many years of preparation are now out strewn out in books and youtube videos for anyone to find. How will we recognize these Diamond-sharp tools? Will we, and do we, mistake them for blunt, useless instruments?
I can have the best vegetable seeds on the market, harvested from plants grown with great attention and love in idyllic conditions on the most Organic farm known to man (I'm salivating...ha ha ha!). I can plant those seeds in my roof garden today. But if the soil hasn't been nurtured, and if I don't water and care for those seeds consistently over time, it won't matter how amazing the promise of great plants might be, nothing is going to grow in those conditions.
I came across some of the most potent teachings of my life over twenty years ago, but didn't recognize them. I was too busy hunting for anything that would give me a big peak experience. In my book it was all about gathering enough of these peak experiences, out-of-body moments, and overwhelming energy encounters, and amassing a lot of them. Then if I could string them all together, I could live in one big extended peak experience for life. So tell me, how is that any different that any other kind of addict? Seeking a peak experience from a bottle, a pill, a whatever? The only difference being that my addiction was legal and encouraged widely in the spiritual marketplace.
After years of this cat and mouse game with myself, I'm now (mostly) at the place where I know that biggest focus of my path is inside of me, if not the only useful focus. What am I believing? Can I know it's the Truth for certain? What happens when I believe "x"? What's here when I let go of all beliefs and sit quietly in gratitude and appreciation of this Moment exactly as it is, without a story or narration going in the background...just this moment, this inhalation, exactly as it is...not a good inhalation, not a bad inhalation, just the breath circulating.
And in this moment of just simple awareness of my own breath, I am present. When I am present, this Presence burns off the image of dark threatening clouds, revealing the Sun always steadily shining within.
Do I really need one more book? One more lecture? One more technique? Or do I have everything I need right Here? Am I willing to cultivate this garden over time, protecting the little Oak Tree shoots until they're strong and tall with deep roots, and broad leaves that give shade to anyone who's ready to rest in the Oasis of Reality?
I Am.
Saturday, November 21, 2009
Do You Ever...
Do you ever wonder? Really wonder?
I don't remember a time when I didn't. This kind of curiosity has been the consistent nudge from the Universe that's kept me discovering over and over again new territory outside the confines of what I've already known. It's given me leverage to let go of the familiar and stay engaged with the adventure that is my life.
I remember driving with my Mom in the passenger seat on Sunset Boulevard one stunning sunny afternoon as she turned to me and said, "You're not really a rule-follower, are you?"
"No," I managed to get out through an explosion of laughter, "I'm not."
It's not that I disregard structure, guidelines, rules, and laws. I refuse to be defined by the seeming known. I've always sensed, as far back as I can remember, that there is more to life than what my five senses, the traditional education system, and the media have attempted to condition me with through my intellect.
This natural wonder, curiosity, and reaching through the Unknown...I can't imagine living any other way. Every time I start to get locked into a point of view these days, as my body contracts into position with it, something in me pokes me in the ribs and says, "Wake up...this isn't freedom...look again...let go of trying to control this."
I don't remember a time when I didn't. This kind of curiosity has been the consistent nudge from the Universe that's kept me discovering over and over again new territory outside the confines of what I've already known. It's given me leverage to let go of the familiar and stay engaged with the adventure that is my life.
I remember driving with my Mom in the passenger seat on Sunset Boulevard one stunning sunny afternoon as she turned to me and said, "You're not really a rule-follower, are you?"
"No," I managed to get out through an explosion of laughter, "I'm not."
It's not that I disregard structure, guidelines, rules, and laws. I refuse to be defined by the seeming known. I've always sensed, as far back as I can remember, that there is more to life than what my five senses, the traditional education system, and the media have attempted to condition me with through my intellect.
This natural wonder, curiosity, and reaching through the Unknown...I can't imagine living any other way. Every time I start to get locked into a point of view these days, as my body contracts into position with it, something in me pokes me in the ribs and says, "Wake up...this isn't freedom...look again...let go of trying to control this."
Friday, November 20, 2009
Starting at the Beginning...
I have been challenged by money in my life. I'm the only one, right? Ha ha ha! The flow of abundance (or not) weighs on nearly 99% of the people I know. And so many of us have avoided really looking at it, for fear that looking at it might conjure a nasty beast whose only interest is to consume us into non-existence, or worse yet, prolonged suffering. Yet avoiding this area is actually what's prolonging the suffering.
The flow, or lack thereof of money, at any given time, has historically held more weight over my self-opinion than the Truth of who and what I am. Over time, this has shifted, and in particular over the last few months of working with the principles in my friend and mentor, David Elliott's, new book HEALING. And there's still tremendous room for me to grow and develop in this area.
I've been revisiting beginnings. If it's true what David has said, "The approach determines the landing," then paging back through time to my beginnings in the areas of my life that are important to me now has given and will continue to open rich veins of insight into how things are playing out, and how to work with them differently.
However, if I'm not clear about how I got where I am, then I'm fairly likely to repeat the past.
The source of any and all of it, will continue to come back to my relationship with myself. My relationship with all of life is a perfect mirror of my relationship with all the aspects of myself. As I study myself, a sacred merger can happen and I become intimate with all of life. As I avoid myself, I become alienated from all of life. It's that simple.
I'm starting today with educating myself on the origins of money in a book by the same name, ON THE ORIGINS OF MONEY published in 1892 by Carl Menger.
As I bring myself up to speed on the beginnings of money, I'm simultaneously bringing myself up close and personal on my relationship with money by revisiting with fresh eyes, my beginnings with money and exchange.
May my studies be fully guided by Living Wisdom that has been purified by the sacred fire of Truth, Wisdom that goes far beyond intellect and words, and through its clarity, hones, sharpens, and aligns all my thoughts, feelings, and actions with Truth.
On the heels of writing all of that, this came in through Intuition, loud and clear:
You are endeavoring to master 'perception', namely your own. As you Master perception you can alter the perceived value of any goods or services with which you are involved, and lift exchange to its rightful place as a Sacred Act; that is an act which is fully aligned with the Truth of Spirit, the Truth of Reality.
The flow, or lack thereof of money, at any given time, has historically held more weight over my self-opinion than the Truth of who and what I am. Over time, this has shifted, and in particular over the last few months of working with the principles in my friend and mentor, David Elliott's, new book HEALING. And there's still tremendous room for me to grow and develop in this area.
I've been revisiting beginnings. If it's true what David has said, "The approach determines the landing," then paging back through time to my beginnings in the areas of my life that are important to me now has given and will continue to open rich veins of insight into how things are playing out, and how to work with them differently.
However, if I'm not clear about how I got where I am, then I'm fairly likely to repeat the past.
The source of any and all of it, will continue to come back to my relationship with myself. My relationship with all of life is a perfect mirror of my relationship with all the aspects of myself. As I study myself, a sacred merger can happen and I become intimate with all of life. As I avoid myself, I become alienated from all of life. It's that simple.
I'm starting today with educating myself on the origins of money in a book by the same name, ON THE ORIGINS OF MONEY published in 1892 by Carl Menger.
As I bring myself up to speed on the beginnings of money, I'm simultaneously bringing myself up close and personal on my relationship with money by revisiting with fresh eyes, my beginnings with money and exchange.
May my studies be fully guided by Living Wisdom that has been purified by the sacred fire of Truth, Wisdom that goes far beyond intellect and words, and through its clarity, hones, sharpens, and aligns all my thoughts, feelings, and actions with Truth.
On the heels of writing all of that, this came in through Intuition, loud and clear:
You are endeavoring to master 'perception', namely your own. As you Master perception you can alter the perceived value of any goods or services with which you are involved, and lift exchange to its rightful place as a Sacred Act; that is an act which is fully aligned with the Truth of Spirit, the Truth of Reality.
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